Day +14: Fickschnitzel!

Okay, I confess. I´ve been having a hard time accepting the fact that I need to stay day after day after day on Nazi station just because of my stupid thrombocytes ("You don´t want to get brain bleeding now do you?" Erm... I´m not sure. If I can have Döner with it I´m quite indecisive... ;)). But after whining about that for two days I finally found enough unicorn power left in me to make my peace with another week in hell (I mean anything before Day +14 would have been reeeeeally fast). I was fine with it really.

And then yesterday they showed their whole glory of naziness (I guess that´s not a word but you know what I mean ;)). "You´re moving!" Oh great, home? *hope building up* "Noooooo, to room 12!" *hope crashing to ground* Oh and please, don´t help me pack my stuff or carry it, I´m fine enough really, I mean my Hb already is at 9.4, right? Yeah, so I´m now in room 12 which has

• no ac,
• no shower (soo funny, just this morning they allowed me to use the shower again only to then put me in a room without shower. A classic nazi move!),
• no toilet (please don´t ask -.-),
• a window facing the helicopter landing field. Which is not loud at all. (they were really trying to sell me an open window as something I should be glad about. Sure, with over 30°C outside I really want to open the window),
• no window shades (the sun is only burning through my windows from 12 to 5. Which is nothing, basically -.-).

Since the room is so nice and not hot at all I basically spend the whole day outside, chasing Pokémon (and geese :)), eating ice cream and sweating. My doc called me today on my mobile phone to check whether I was still alive because I was gone so long (probably had horrible day dreams about me lying somewhere having a brain bleeding. Poor thing ;)).

But to be honest the whole situation really got me down. I haven´t felt as bad as yesterday or cried as much throughout my whole illness (not even on the day I got my diagnosis. Actually, I didn´t cry at all cause my "let´s bring it on" attitude automically kicked in). I´m not really greeted with empathy or understanding from any of the nurses or docs they really don´t get why I´m not celebrating. No, it gets better, most of them see my behaviour as some kind of affront and react offended. Fickschnitzel, all of them!
I´ve prescribed myself a huge amount of metal throughout the last night so my mood has been a lot better today (citing Five Finger Death Punch "I won´t be broken, I won´t be tortured, I won´t be beaten down. I have the answer, I can take the pressure, I will turn it all around").

Those little bastards that keep me here have been 15k today. Only 3k to go. That´s nothing, right? ...Right???